So, this morning I read this
article, regarding daughters and gifts
I have to say that I’m pretty torn on this
topic. While I consciously choose to buy
“gender neutral” toys (I’ll discuss more on that definition later on), I don’t
like the idea of withholding gifts that I might not choose. Maybe it’s just because I haven’t actually
been given anything I wouldn’t necessarily want Miss A to have (except maybe
that giant dog her great-grandmother got her for Christmas….but that’s entirely
because the dog seems bigger than my living room). And maybe it’s because I grew up as a Barbie
fanatic. The thing I loved most about my
Barbie’s was dressing them up, doing their hair, etc. I knew they had boobs. But I didn’t know they had “big boobs.” Or maybe I did but didn’t really care? And, not all of my Barbie’s were blonde. And I had at least one Ken that I could
remember too. I don’t recall idolizing
her as a woman – she was a toy doll I enjoyed to play pretend with. That’s it.
I didn’t go to bed dreaming to be like her. I mostly went to bed dreaming to be like
Ariel in the Little Mermaid swimming in the ocean.
Anyway, as I mentioned before, I do try to choose
things that are gender neutral – and by gender neutral, I typically mean in
color only. So I look for things that
are bright colored, with a variety of color.
For instance, Santa is bringing Miss A a play kitchen. I didn’t want to get her a pink kitchen
because, first off, pink is horrendous, and second, kitchens in real life aren’t
pink. And, if we have a boy the second
time around, while I don’t care if he likes pink things, I don’t want him to
feel like he can’t play with it because it is pink. Regardless of what we will try to teach our
kids, there will be a lot of outside influences on them, and at some point,
they will learn pink = girls, blue = boys, whether we want them to or not. And, when it comes to things that tend to be
gender specific by nature (dolls vs. trucks), all I can do is let Miss A have
equal exposure to all types of toys, and let her decide what her preferences
are. I don’t feel like I ought to limit
her choices or exposure to different types of toys. I mean, they’re just toys! And while this may sound contradictory, there
will be limits – like if something is not age appropriate and potentially
dangerous, or if say she does get a doll or any sort which is dressed totally risqué
(which, may not be farfetched these days), then I may intervene. If she’s old enough, we’ll have a conversation
about it. But just because I may have
preferred she got a wooden puzzle over a plastic Barbie doll doesn’t mean she
can’t still engage in meaningful play. I mean, I loved my Barbie’s and I wanted to
be a princess. But, I grew up. And while I am a blonde with big boobs, that’s
purely a genetic coincidence. But I certainly
didn’t let that define me and tell me to be a ditzy bimbo with a sugar
daddy. If anything, I’ve had to work
HARDER to be where I am because, you know, pretty girls can’t be smart. *eyeroll*
But, that’s a topic for another day…
